So what happens when your ex reaches out to you during this period? Do you respond? Do you ignore them? If you respond, what do you even say?! The no contact rule is basically a predetermined amount of time during which you do not speak to or reach out to your ex. Making sure that you take care of yourself, bounce back from the breakup, and become the best version of yourself.
You see, 2 directly depends on 1. The way you make an ex miss and fear losing you is by showing them what they stand to lose. Ok so now what?! Is it possible to get back in touch too early?
When Your Ex Girlfriend Reaches Out After a Long Time of No Contact
Well, yes, it most certainly is possible. In any case, if your ex reaches out to youmore avenues for reestablishing contact are opening up to you.
The way to do this is to be very honest with yourself and determine whether or not replying to your ex will be the right move at this stage…. Each situation is entirely unique, so there is no general answer to what to do when an ex contacts you. It will always depend on your situation. This exists in a variety of different forms. For example:. They become very needy and clingy, they suffocate their ex with constant phone calls or text messages, or they lash out and begin threatening or blackmailing….
I am fully aware of the fact that you probably really do want to reply to your ex right now. Yes, there are exceptions to the rule and I just told you what the biggest one is, but you have to be very honest with yourself right now. If you know in your heart of hearts that it will not benefit you to respond to your ex right now, do not do it.
You have to honestly analyze the situation so that you can ensure that you will boost your odds of success as much as possible.
Temptation is intense right now, trust me I know. But give yourself the greatest odds of success! You want them to feel like they want to get some more — they want to talk to you more, they want to find out more, share more, do more… that would make it too easy for them to distance themselves as well. Bonus: 3 advanced strategies that will turn you into a Human Relationships Expert and give you the tools to get back with the one you love The no contact rule: What exactly is it?
The point of all of this is simple. In fact, there are two goals: 1.Watch the important video above all the way through to learn what to do when your ex contacts you during no contact. Your education on this topic and preparedness for when your ex reaches out is extremely important to getting your ex back so take your time on this page.
In an effort to get your ex back, you applied the no contact rule. You showed composure, confidence, class, and dignity. Though the articles on this website assured you that the odds were in your favor that your ex would contact you, it still seemed like a fairy tale. You picked it up and it was a message from your ex!
You knew that how you responded to your ex in this situation was important. Your ex has texted you, should you text back? I want you to know what to do and what not to do when your ex contacts you during your application of the no contact rule.
My Ex Contacted Me During No Contact: Help!!
It would seem that you would be able to use the history that the two of you have to your advantage. As you walk that trail you will find that thorns have grown over parts of it and trees have fallen down over the path.
The relationship has now seen a time of separation and hurt feelings. It is different in complex and in simple ways. You want a new relationship that still has many of the same elements from the previous one but that is on a stronger foundation and can last. In this way, they are taking minimal risk but likely hoping that you will stick your neck out and express desire to get back together with them.
So when your ex reaches out with casual or even flirtatious texts, these are breadcrumbs or bread crumbs that they hope will leave a trail that you will follow to the endpoint of you being the one to say that you want to get back together with them or make the first move.
Some people believe that your ex must directly state that they want to get back together or you should not participate in the conversation. I will get into that more in this article but I can tell you that breadcrumbing is not a bad thing if you want your ex back. It should seem that such an idea is not on your mind and that you have most certainly not been sitting around waiting on them to contact you.
The very fact that your ex has reached out to you texts, emails, snaps, or calls probably means that your no contact has been able to make your ex miss you and they are interested in getting back together — at least to some degree. If your ex is contacting you during no contact, the odds are extremely high that they want to see you and are thinking they want to get back together with you if you will have them.When your ex girlfriend reaches out after a long time of no contact, the emotions come back, old passions flare, and your brain starts spinning around wondering what the heck you should do.
I mean, obviously, right? My ex girlfriend just reached out after 6 months of no contact! What should I do to get her back?! But now she called me yesterday two times in a row. I did not answer her calls, and soon after that, she sent me a text with a screenshot of a math problem she wanted me to help her solve.
Why would she ask me? And when your ex girlfriend reaches out after a long time of no contact… what matters is that she is reaching out. Even if what she says seems random or pointless. The bottom line is that your ex girlfriend is reaching out. As a man, being AWARE of this female psychology secret allows you to understand what your ex girlfriend reacts to, and you will have a greater chance to get her back.
In your case, asking for help with a math problem was her way of reaching out. As a man, you have to read these signals, be decisive, and confidently lead the interaction to where you want it to go. Most men sabotage their chance to get their ex back because they make the following mistake…. Look, I get it. When you and your ex girlfriend first started going out… how did you behave?
What was going through your mind? I want to really try and remember this. There was no pressure to be officially together.
It was all good emotions and FUN. You were PRESENT in the moment… there was lots of laughing… flirting… teasing… overall lots of positive emotions that allowed her to feel a strong sexual and emotional chemistry with you. I know, I know… this is so much easier said than done.
For more information, read The No Contact Rule. They will ask if no contact makes their ex miss them or want to get back together, if the no contact rule works on men, women, etc. If you want to know what is he thinking during no contact or shethis article will explain the concept for both the male and female mind during no contact. Just because you know what your ex is thinking during no contact does not mean that you should reach out to him or her. But even then, if you are giving your ex space and not pestering them with texts and calls, they are likely using your greatest ally — their mind — to separate the anger at the end from the rest of your relationship.
Usually the person who has been broken up with feels the pain of no contact immediately and then begins to develop strength over time. The person who did the dumping usually feels strength and often relief at the very first, but with the days and weeks of no contact your ex likely begins to develop feelings of doubt in their decision, missing you, fear that you have moved on, and confusion that you have not chased, begged, and pleaded as most others do after being dumped.
These thoughts and feelings build and compound. Like slowly stepping on a gas peddle of a car, the engine, in this case, is their mind, and it begins to move faster and heat up as the days pass. I hope that you are encouraged, as most people are, to learn what your ex is thinking during no contact and that your ex is most likely having feelings of separation anxiety, doubting their decision to break up with you, and that by not contacting them that you have likely been able to get your ex to miss you.
What to do if your ex contacts you during the no contact period
They the person who has been dumped think that reaching out to their ex while they are feeling those things will result in reconciliation, so they break no contact with a text or a call. Unfortunately, this actually does flick a switch in the mind of your ex, but not the one you want. It usually resets nearly everything that not contacting your ex had accomplished.
By you reaching out, you showed the signs of missing them and now they no longer see you strong because even though you waited a little while, you still reached out to them. They now feel that they have all the time in the world to make a decision and date around without the risk of losing you forever. If you stay strong with no contact, the odds are in your favor that your ex will reach out in time. But I can tell you that allowing your ex to come to you will usually work much better to get them to come back and will give greater odds to a long term relationship working than if you contact them.
And when your ex breaks up with this person, the odds are that this person will do the wrong things.
This person will beg, plead, text, call, show up like a stalker, and all of the things that I coach you not to do. To give yourself the best chance possible to get your ex back, you need powerful strategy and the benefit of my experience gained by two decades and thousands of cases of professional observations.
Get my Emergency Breakup Kit today! April 9, April 9, April 3, April 9, March 26, March 30, Coach Lee helps people get their ex back after a breakup. He developed The Emergency Breakup Kita powerful guide to winning back an ex. You must be logged in to post a comment.
Related Posts. About Coach Lee Coach Lee helps people get their ex back after a breakup.Because of how poorly he handled the situation, Glantz told him she was done with the relationship. But just one week later, her ex started texting her again as if everything was totally normal between them. We asked therapists to explain why an ex might be texting you post-split and how to respond or not if it happens to you.
If your ex was the one who initiated the breakup in the first place but then decides to start texting you again out of the blue, it can be baffling. If the relationship ended on bad terms or your ex feels the breakup was their fault, they may be texting you out of guilt and a desire to make things right, Rodman added. Another possibility? Whether they are hoping to get back together or develop a friendship, texting is a low-risk way to gauge your interest.
And if you were the one to break things off, your ex could be reaching out in order to get some closure. And who knows: Your ex could be sitting at home bored, just fishing for attention from an old flame to pass the time. Your stomach drops, your heart starts beating faster, your palms get sweaty. But after the initial excitement from the ex text has worn off, the feelings that follow can be a mixed bag. In other cases, receiving a text from an ex can immediately bring up feelings of annoyance, dread or even fear — particularly if the relationship was a toxic and unhappy one that you want distance from.
Know that you have every right to ignore a text from your ex — especially if replying will put your mental health or safety in jeopardy. But what about when the relationship was, for the most part, happy and healthy? But you leave theirs too. End the texts. Take the time you would use to write something brilliant back for self-care. Need help? In the U. News U. HuffPost Personal Video Horoscopes.
Newsletters Coupons. Follow Us. Part of HuffPost Relationships. All rights reserved. Huffington Post. Eugenio Marongiu via Getty Images. Suggest a correction. You Should Too. Newsletter Sign Up.
What To Do When Your Ex Contacts You During No Contact
Successfully Subscribed!Click here to learn exactly how to make your ex want you back. In all cases though, my answer is pretty much the same: Respond!
Answer the call! Reply to the text message or email. The trick, though, when your ex contacts you, is how do you respond? Maybe you were even harassing your ex with too many texts or calls or personal interactions.
In this scenario, following the no contact rule has required all the self-discipline you could command, and being contacted by your ex now is disruptive enough to throw you off balance.
You hope that this contact is a sign your ex wants you back. Now you wonder, what is the right thing to say? My answer is the same, for both scenarios.
You want to get your ex back, so be friendly and welcoming. Be upbeat. Act like you would act if you were receiving a call from any friend you want to hear from. It helps if you can prepare ahead of time, and decide in advance what you want to say if your ex contacts you. If you have time to read this article, you probably have time to do this.
Have in mind some things you could talk about. Above all, take the high road.Ignoring An Ex - When An Ex Reaches Out During Radio Silence
Topics like music, movies, work or school, and family, are usually safe. Do you need additional instructions on how to get your ex back using no contact? I recommend a book called The Magic of Making Up. I like it because of its focus on relationship psychology. Understanding the psychology of relationships is a key factor in getting your ex back. Read his story, and then towards the bottom of the page be sure to click his button for downloading the book, so you can get started on getting your ex back today!
We are dedicated to helping you do just that. Whether you want to get back with your ex girlfriend, or get your boyfriend back — we have the best, no-nonsense advice to help you plan your attack.
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To get him back To get her back God's help to be reunited To survive infidelity To make him want you To save your marriage To cure your depression. What to do if your ex contacts you during the no contact period By Dan K. Get back with your ex We are dedicated to helping you do just that. Most Popular Agree with the breakup.
Apology letter to girlfriend for cheating on her. Prayers to get ex back. Is it easier to get your ex back when you have children together? How to get back an ex with the power of prayer. How to maintain no contact with your ex when you have a child together. Prayer to get ex boyfriend back.By Chris Seiter. The No Contact Rule is a predetermined amount of time during which you cut off all communication with your ex, without explanation.
In the meantime, your ex has the chance to recover from the breakup and forget some of the negative emotions and memories associated with it, and with you. He has the chance to miss you. The No Contact Rule really is the best first step after my free quizof course! And if your ex contacts you first?
Your mind is trying to find ways to process this breakup, and it will find interesting ways to rationalise why you should get back in contact with your ex. If you break your No Contact Rule prematurely before your predetermined length of time, you need to start over from Day 1. These are all really good signs that No Contact is working. These are all common reactions, and show that he is having an emotional reaction to your withdrawal.
There are a couple of situations where ignoring him might not be possible — if he turns up and you are face to face, or if he asks to get his belongings back or you need something important or valuable back from him.
If you refuse a reasonable request, you would seem rude and obstinate; not very helpful if you want to get back together. Leave it. If he wants something back, be gracious about it and agree to meet him to exchange.
When you do see him, keep the interaction short and sweet. You are busy getting on with your life. If he turns up suddenly wherever you are and you have to talk to him or you would appear completely rude — the same rules apply. If you are out and about, I will assume you are being the Ungettable Girl and looking the best you can. So, if he asks how you are, tell him you are great, thanks. Be the one to end the conversation. You want to leave him wanting more.
Especially if you were gnatting him beforehand bothering him constantly, like an annoying little fly. And most especially if, at the same time as rebuffing all contact, you are seemingly having the time of your life and not wallowing in the usual post-breakup misery. His male pride will be smarting at least a little bit.
Now the issue is that if you break your own No Contact Rule by responding to any messages, you undermine the effectiveness of the Rule. His curiosity disappears. I can get her to talk to me anytime I want. Oftentimes you find the answers you need in the grey areas.
That can certainly be true with a No Contact Rule. So what is the Limited No Contact Rule? Limited No Contact is a predetermined amount of time after specific types of breakups where you cut off all communication except on essential matters. Instead you must use the Limited No Contact Rule.